Episode 11: For The Children
Tonight, we delve into
"Children's Day At The Morgue"
written by Sheldon Allman & Rod McMullin
originally performed by Sheldon Allman
and "Come Little Children"
written by James Horner & Brock Walsh
originally performed by Sarah Jessica Parker
Thanks to DJ Pat K for helping me get my hands on those Dracula PSAs! Check out his mixcloud for more vintage music and obscuro grooves!
This article by D. Melhoff was a big help in getting to the bottom of the misinformation surrounding "Come Little Children."
Liner Notes Transcription:
(Typed by Sheila O'Neill, please email Radio Transylvania should you find any errors)
It was a quiet, moonlit evening in Spring. Two successful Hollywood songwriters, Sheldon Allman and Rod McMullin, were counting the residue of the unemployment insurance checks upon which they were both living (if you can call this living). They were enjoying one of those riotous evenings for which the rest of America envies Hollywood, consisting of splitting a half gallon of Grenache Rose and viewing with glazed eyes the late night movies on the snow-bound television set. Suddenly, like a bolt from the blue, the inspiration struck. The Country was reeling under a barrage of "Sing-Along" albums, cunningly devised to induce the participation of the listener; to get him (her) (you) to sing along with a group of professional singers (jolly types all) who have long since picked up their AFTRA checks and gone home, doubtless to sing along with themselves. (And what is bothering me is, does anybody really sing along or is this a gigantic fraud perpetrated upon the public by people with beards?)
As I was saying back there before the digression, inspiration struck. "Why Not?" said fun loving Shel, "do an album called Sing-Along With Drac?" His partner was obviously stunned by the implications of the idea. Fully half an hour passed as he mulled the idea, the rest of the Grenache Rose, and the farmer's raven-haired daughter. Finally, exhausted, he raised limpid grey eyes (which he kept on his watch chain in lieu of a fob) and asked the piercing question, "Are you out of your nut? Who'd buy a thing like that?"
Eagerly, irrepressible Shel expostulated, "Ghosties, goblins, and things that go bump in the night. Werewolves, vampires, incubbi, succubi, witches, wizards, trolls, ghouls, and all the night people you see going to all night horror movies and fleeing as the dawn approches: the great teeming unexploited mass of night people. Too long has Tin Pan Alley ignored this minority group. Where are the songs to express their inarticulate longings? Here, at long last, will be THEIR music.
He collapsed on the floor, exhausted by this spate of rhetoric.
"No." said Rod wearily, "you fail to apprehend my meaning. In short, you do not dig: I mean who'd buy a thing like that? Who would put it out?"
Allman considered this. "Well," he offered (and was accepted) "there's always Bob Keene down at Del-Fi. We could show the stuff to him. He'll put it out."
So they did... And he did... And here it is.
Frequently the buyer of albums will find in the liner notes detailed biographies of the writers, and/or the artist. These biographies cover facts such as dates and places of birth, educational background, marital status, whether they sleep in the tops or bottoms of pajamas, or both -or neither- or whether it all depends on the circumstances. The writers of this album feel that none of this is any of your business. They hope they are not out of line.
As for the Artist, Sheldon Allman (yes, he's one of the writers too!! Oh, you thought they were two people? No, only in his mind) feels that the only pertinent facts the public needs to know is that he is hungry for money, fame, recognition, status, food, clothes, and the love of a good woman (or what have you?). He says he will do anything to achieve any or all of these solidly American goals. Anything at all. And if you doubt that, just listen to this album.
However, we know that there are those of you who will not be put off by the above... who must (yes, must) know their heroes intimately. If such be the case with you, simply send a stamped self-addressed envelope and a dossier on Sheldon Allman will be mailed to you, such as would bring a blush to the cheek of night.